The beginning of a fresh new year is a great time to reflect upon how you might say yes to new people, places, or things. Or perhaps to the new You who may arise as you (re)commit to practicing better self-care. We can find lists of things to say yes to in magazines, or by listening to podcasts, or by comparing ourselves to other people (I'll do what she's doing!), but these changes often don't stick do they?
That's because they are arising from outside of you.
The true Power of Yes! (capitalized and with an exclamation point!) bubbles up from inside of you, usually starting in the heart with tiny bubbles of yearning (barely there), that you only notice ... once ... in ... a ...... while. But if you acknowledge them, they get bigger, more noticeable, until eventually they are capable of sweeping you off your feet and into your Best Life.
This is the power of your heart—unleashed.
An inward desire to have a farm bubbled in my heart for decades, springing from my experience as a young girl growing up on a small farm. My spirit loved being with the animals and living close to nature's ways. But eventually I moved away and started a different life for myself. It was a life based upon the expectations of others, of trying to conform to what society deemed "successful." My heart didn't want that life, but I hadn't yet learned to listen to it—my head was too busy keeping up appearances and too bossy trying to control things that were none of my business.
So I totally ignored those tiny bubbles for years — I moved to a city and studied engineering; I put on power suits (even pantyhose!) and took a corporate job; I got married right on time to the good (and appropriate) man I was with — but the bubbles inside grew and bubbled over periodically. The discomfort caused by the bubbling made me do rash things to try to find happiness.
When I was only 26, I talked my husband at the time into quitting the rat race by selling our house and literally sailing away from our blooming careers. That was a pretty bold move, but it didn't stick. I found myself back in a "normal" life within a year. That's partly because sailing away didn't have anything to do with my heart's true desire. My head cleverly chose that form of escape so that my husband would come with me. In hindsight, I see that this wasn't really a Yes! at all; it was actually a loud No! to the chaotic and stressful upwardly-mobile urban-professional lifestyle that was all the rage (rage!) in the 80s.
"Nothing creative ever came from No."
Chapter 1: The Power of Yes!
My head continued to make a hot mess of things as I spent the next decade focusing outward, using my big brain to analyze my life in comparison to others, to worry about what other people thought, to judge my partners and circumstances, to create mental lists of all that was wrong or scary. It was a life built upon No. These negative thought patterns sucked me into unhealthy routines, escapism, and anxious or angry reactions to the world around me. Even so, I managed to create a life most considered successful, which speaks volumes about our society's flawed definition of success.
Then one day my little boy asked to hatch some chicken eggs we'd gathered at a local farm. My head was ready with a quick habitualized "No, I don't have time for that" and "No, we don't have enough land," to name a few perfectly sensible excuses. Except this time a giant bubble in my heart took me over, and caused a powerful Yes! to spring forth from my core. It was out before I could stop it, before my head could get a word in. The brilliant effect was instantaneous:
"In that instant of enthusiastic Yes! decades of tension left my body. I was in the here and now, like a child, completely absorbed in the brilliant new adventure of hatching eggs. All the cells in my body slurped thirstily as this feeling, this fresh, clean rain washed my muddy tension away."
     Chapter 1: The Power of Yes!
I would have thought that hatching those eggs and raising the chicks in our backyard would have overwhelmed me, but the opposite was true; indulging my heart in this powerful new purpose transformed me. As my head became curious about and involved in the process of hatching the eggs, my spinning thoughts slowed, and I learned to appreciate my life's moments. Observing the ways of the chickens inspired me to try different mindful practices. I discovered meditation and learned to focus my beautiful mind on thoughts of my choosing instead of the incessant negative chatter.
Soon I was living a life of my heart's creation—a life made for me by me. I spent the next 15 years on a farm that surpassed even my best daydream and I continue to live from my heart today in my new life of healthy loving partnership, creativity, and travel. Along the way, my heart's choice sometimes confounded me, causing my head to protest ... How could that possibly work?, but I've learned to trust my inner ethereal intelligence. This wisdom—somehow both deeper and higher—always delivers what is for the highest good of all concerned. Solutions to every problem that comes along manifest in perfect time. I have become a better person, a better parent, and a better partner in the course of following my heart's inner Yes!
How does your heart's desire try to communicate with you? What does it feel like? What would it take to trust it more often?
If you'd like to share about such topics and find support with like-minded people, I invite you to join my new Facebook group (coming soon!). My heart, in this instant of writing to you, has surged with a surprising Yes! to creating such a thing after years of shyness with social media. But now I eagerly anticipate the blessings that will flow from this convergence of our hearts.
I will now put my head to work figuring out how to make it so. :)